Now that you know why it is so important to set clear goals, it’s time to discover what you really want. Most people, when setting goals, don’t take the time to do this because they don’t really know what it is they want. This can be a problem because if you’re not sure what it is you want, chances are high that you will drift through life and not achieve much.
With our incredibly hectic lives, this is understandable. By the end of the day, you may be thoroughly exhausted, making the thought of planning your life’s goals the last thing on your mind. By the time you get to the weekend, you may be so exhausted from your week, that thinking about what you want from your life has taken a back burner. Life can be difficult, and when you’ve had numerous disappointments along the way, it can be hard to believe that you would be able to achieve all the dreams that you had as a child.
The good news is that discovering what you want to achieve in your life is easy, even if you’re not sure what you want right now. When you know what it is you want from life, you’re chances of achieving it increase. Many people know exactly what they want in their lives and can achieve even their most prominent dreams as a result.
Overcoming Disappointment and Setbacks
For many people, by the time they’ve reached their late 20s, they’ve closed their own ability to dream big because they’ve had so many disappointments and setbacks in their life.
During our childhood, life can seem full of amazing possibilities, and we are excited about what the future holds. However, the harsh realities of life can often knock us down. Relationships that didn’t turn out as we had hoped, careers that went wrong, illnesses, and numerous other disappointments are all a part of growing up and learning that life isn’t always a bed of roses. The challenges we face in our life can enable us to become stronger, wiser, and more capable individuals, or they can cause us to become disillusioned, disempowered, and disappointed in our life. The disappointments we encounter in our life, condition us to believe that we will face even more challenges in the future. Unfortunately, we often experience what we think may happen.
In chapter nine, you will learn how to overcome these self-limiting beliefs, so that you can begin dreaming big again and start making exciting plans for your future. If you know exactly what it is you want to achieve in your life, congratulations, you’re one of the very few individuals who know what they truly desire.
For those who don’t know what they want, you may not be consciously aware of your life’s most significant goals. To start figuring out what you want from life, follow this simple exercise.
Discover What You Want from Life
The first step to discovering what you want from life is to consider your life and record all the things that cause you to suffer. Write down everything that creates pain for you on some level. This could include things like your career, your income, your relationships, your health, your weight, your emotions, your family, and a variety of other issues. Next, you want to transform these problems into concrete goals. To do this, merely convert each issue into its complete opposite. For example, if you always seem to end up in unhappy relationships, you can create a goal to begin having deep, fulfilling, lasting relationships from now on. You can quickly create goals to achieve the opposite of what you are experiencing currently in your life. Simply for the very reason that you are presently suffering from each of these areas in your life means you can transform them into powerful goals that will motivate you to create the change in your life that you desire.
Absolutely anything that has been causing you pain, especially if it’s been going on for a while, can be transformed into its opposite to create a powerful new goal.
You may think that it’s impossible to change, especially if the problem has been going on for years, or that it may be too hard to transform. You may be thinking, “It’s never changed before, so why would I even consider that it might change in the future?” It’s natural to be pessimistic, especially when you’ve never seen any evidence that it’s possible to change. Many people hold themselves back because of what they believe or don’t believe. The information in chapter nine will show you some powerful tools and techniques that you can use to overcome your self-limiting beliefs that are holding you back. You will also discover how to open your faith in the possibility of a great future.
Wants and Needs
Everyone has desires, and desires can be incredibly motivating, but they can also quickly get out of control and can drive us in ways that can be detrimental to our health and well-being. A sincere desire to help others can change the world. However, the constant desire for more money and material possessions can be destructive and unfulfilling.
Desire can be a very powerful creative force that pushes us to get out of bed in the morning, to eat, sleep, and work to pay for everything you want and to look after your family. Even your ability to read, relax, watch a movie or listen to music is a product of your desire.
Your entire life is a reflection and expression of what you desire. To avoid your desires becoming destructive, it is essential to understand the difference between what we want and what we need for our survival. It is crucial that you know that your needs are entirely different from your wants. A need is something that is important for us to live in a way that allows us to truly enrich our lives and that may also contribute to other’s happiness. It supports our life at a profound level. This includes food, shelter, clothing, security, fulfilling relationships, new experiences, and a variety of other things.
Wants are things that you don’t genuinely need. They are things that you can survive without or things that don’t make your truly happy. You may think that getting a bigger house, owning an expensive car, or living a life of abundance and endless free time will make you happy. However, there is no guarantee that achieving these kinds of goals will make your life truly fulfilling.
You can feel successful and wealthy without having any trinkets to prove to yourself that you are rich and successful. This doesn’t mean you should fake it until you make it. Instead, it is essential to start working to overcome low self-esteem and gradually improve your self-worth. Your environment will begin to reflect this inner change, and you will start to find external opportunities that will help you to improve your finances and increase your material possessions.
When you create a big goal for your life, it’s essential to discover the real, underlying reason why you want to achieve that goal, being completely honest with yourself. Uncovering your “Big Why” will give you a powerful motivating force that will drive your life in the direction that you both need and want.
How to Discover Your “Big Why”
When you desire something, it’s important to ask yourself whether you need it or whether you just want it. You need to try to figure out if you’re just avoiding some form of inner change or lack of self-esteem. You need to ask yourself the following questions.
- Do you need it to achieve something genuinely worthwhile?
- Is it something that can contribute to the happiness of others?
Looking at your desires in this way is extremely helpful, especially if you are setting big goals for your life. Remember to ask yourself these questions when you’re setting your goals.
Completing the following exercise can help you determine if you truly need something to achieve your life’s overall plan or if it is merely something that you want.
On a piece of paper, write out each of your goals and add the words “so that” after each one. Next, you want to fill in the reason after the words “so that” to bring you an even deeper understanding of what you want. Keep going by adding more “so that’s” until you figure your single motivating reason for your goal.
When you drill down through each of your goals in this way, getting to the “Big Why,” you become filled with a more profound sense of purpose, energy, connection, and passion. These are the feeling that you’re after because they are extremely helpful in transforming your goals into reality. Goals become truly unstoppable when they are fueled by a burning desire or powerful motivating force.
After doing this exercise, you may discover that some of your goals don’t have a “Big Why” and that they really aren’t as meaningful as you first thought. You may find that these goals are doing nothing more than helping you to avoid something you don’t want to face.
Doing this exercise fully can help you to avoid wasting your time and energy on goals that aren’t as important as you first thought. It can also help you to inject more passion and energy into the goals that you discover are truly worthwhile, putting you on the fast track to achieving them.
Time to Dominate – What Do You Want